When you see a picture of an engagement on instagram, what do you do?
Like?
Comment?
Screenshot?

We are absolutely captivated by love, unity, and commitment.

Romance, in the context of a covenant marriage, is the highest form of human companionship and the deepest level of intimacy. It is vulnerability. It means being fully known, yet fully loved. It means you found someone who sees all your ugly parts and yet, they want to spend forever with you anyways.

As single girls searching for value and worth, we WANT that.
We yearn to be known and accepted at the level a covenant marriage brings.

We see those engagement and wedding posts and envy creeps in, jealousy snags our shirt, and we desire all the attention and affection that accompanies a man on one knee, with that breath-taking diamond ring in his hand.

And yet, this desire is only a shadow of the intimacy Christ truly wants us to experience…in HIM.

As a girl who now has that ring, who has those engagement posts, and who is preparing to marry a man so wonderfully equipped to love me and lead me, I can tell you, it’s not everything.

Don’t misread me, that ring is the most beautiful gift I have ever received. It is the most wonderful representation of eternal unity, as the ring wraps around my finger continuously. It reminds me that Britt loves me without a shadow of a doubt, and that he is willing to spend the rest of his life pursuing me (no matter how complicated or emotional or moody I get). It also reminds me that I said yes to forever with this incredible man of God, whom I love so dearly and deeply, and who far exceeds my expectations and dreams in a future husband.

And yet, in all the wonder and awe I experience as I see Britt pursue me day after day, I am reminded that he is nothing compared to Christ.

You see, Britt listens to my anxieties, he loves me in the midst of my sin, and he cares for my heart.

But Jesus HEALS my anxieties,
Jesus loves me by DYING FOR my sin,
And He RESTORES my heart.

Britt meets my apparent needs, challenges me in my faith, and pushes me to the Word of God.

But Jesus fills every need.
He is the author and perfecter of my faith.
He IS the WORD OF GOD.

Britt is everything I want in a husband, but Jesus is everything I need, period. And if I try to make Britt the goal, if I try to make Britt my Jesus, it will only lead to my own disappoint, insecurity, and discontentment. My heart will always long for more because Britt cannot fill me the way Jesus is meant to, simply because he was not made to!!

Sweet friend, the longing you feel when you scroll through social media, the attention and intimacy you crave, will not be fulfilled or satisfied by a guy. That desire can only be filled by Jesus. And when we truly let Jesus play the role he is meant to rather than seeking it in other people and things, we experience FREEDOM. Freedom from envy, freedom from discontentment, and freedom from our yearning hearts. Freedom to experience intimacy with Christ and freedom to be satisfied in Christ. And then, only after Christ, the freedom to experience intimacy with a man whom God has so graciously gifted us as a partner in this life.

You see, earthly marriage, although a beautifully God-given desire, was NEVER the ultimate goal (God’s gifts are never the goal, but just a benefit of pursuing God himself)…but nevertheless, we have made it our idol. And our idols (no matter how wonderfully God-fearing that man is, or how much he loves you, or how great your relationship is), will never fulfill us the way our Lord intended for us. They always fall short, just as we do.

So sister, don’t place your identity in a man. Don’t place your worth in a relationship (or lack there of). Don’t make your fiancé your idol.

Instead, place your identity in Christ. Place your worth in your relationship with HIM. And let Jesus be your greatest pursuit and deepest desire…”and all these things will be added to you” (Matthew 6:33).

And remember: When you delight yourself in the Lord, He will give you the desires of your heart (Psalm 37:4). He delights in blessing His servant (Psalm 35:27). He gives good gifts to those who ask Him (Matthew 7:11). And although these promises don’t say He will give you a great man on earth and a perfect marriage, it does tell us that He is trustworthy and faithful, and you can RELY ON HIM with your life, with your relationships, and with your future.

And his plans are far greater than you could ever dream!!! Let go and let God. He’s got this.

-Megs